When I first started to write...

I thought if I could stop just one man from harming himself or someone else then it would all be worthwhile.

I was fully embodied into the saviour archetype - and I was writing to help save the men who felt like they were trapped with no way out. I wrote on and off for three years with no idea about how I would manifest my writing into a book.

It was when I joined a workshop called “Write your book in a week” that I really connected with why I was writing.

I realised that I wasn’t writing to try to save men, I was writing because I was still trying to save my grandmother from her pain, distress and anger.

So I wrote my first book about my grandmother and her anger, and it was called “Angry as F*** but no idea why?”

And I also realised I had another two books to write - to cover all three points on the drama triangle. And the death of a close friend, Dominic, really got me present to how short life really is, and so I rushed into getting them written and published.

My second book was about saviour consciousness, and it was called “Rescuer in Recovery. No one is f***ing coming to save you.” 

It is dedicated to Dominic and his driving energy to look after other folks before looking after himself.

My third book was called “I’m F***ing Done” and it was written about divorce and victim consciousness. It was written as a guide for anyone who has reached the end of their tether in a relationship and they’ve got to that very moment when they realise that they can’t take it any more and something has to change. And then they have no idea what to do next.

In the book, it talks about what to do next when you’ve reached that very moment when that thought crystallises. It takes you through each step of the process of grief. It gives you guidance on how to negotiate your way out. The book gives you the structure to choose what you want, and tells you what the common mistakes that I and many other folks have made when they’ve reached that point. 

I’ve coached many clients through separation and divorce over the last 10 years and we’ve faced into some very difficult circumstances with ex-partners taking their own lives, repeated pathological lying that resulted in deportation for an entire family, one partner trying to psychologically torture the other while they were sleeping, lawyers acting unethically and families & friends treating the situation like it’s reality television entertainment and creating massive drama just because they can.

The antidote to victim consciousness is taking responsibility for ourselves, but if you’ve been brought up in a family that doesn’t have any good role models for doing that, then where do you start? In my third book, I also talk about why we make mistakes - and how we got to making them in the first place. I explain what good choices look like, and what the consequences of the bad choices are.

And I use the drama triangle to explain it all and show how emotionally we move from victim consciousness to rescuer to aggressor and back again. Underlying divorce is victim consciousness - and that’s what the book is really about. 

In the last 12-18 months I transitioned to working with entrepreneurs and professional women who were ready to step up into their next challenge - and I called the coaching program ‘Ready-to-Rise’.

My clients created the most delicious adventures for themselves and got their sh*t sorted out in the process. Two of my clients gave birth while we were working together and it was a privilege to be part of supporting that transformation in their lives. I found it amazingly joyful and I loved it, and it’s why I started to write again.

And so my next book was created, “Making Darkness Visible. Creating delicious adventure and getting your sh*t sorted” because that’s exactly what my clients experienced. 

I’m a stand for people taking responsibility for their own emotional wellbeing, and creating lives of delicious adventure and getting their sh*t sorted out.

Join my free VIP list for the launch of my next book, and look out for the special low priced offers I’m going to be making on ALL of my books when I launch.